Bush Memorabilia
April 10, 2008
Since we’re getting close to the elections, it’s time to round up the past four years and take some time to poke gentle fun at the US president. Everyone’s doing it after all. Here is some Bush memorabilia you’ll want to see over and over again. Or at least, until he is replaced.
World’s biggest lobster
April 8, 2008
This huge lobster, which my mouth has been watering over, was caught by a fishing vessel in 238 meters of water off the southern coast of England. The specimen is five times larger than an average lobster and is adorned with distinctive mustaches that weigh over 4 kilograms. The lobster was named Poseidon and is currently being studied by scientists. Poseidon could feed a small village, but I am sure the screams would be deafening when he hit the boiling water.
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Rare Two-Headed Snake Found
March 30, 2008
A rare two-headed snake was found by a farmer in a village in Alicante. The snake with four eyes, two tongues and two sets of eyes is not studied by Spanish scientists. According to preliminary studies, the snake can use both of its heads at the same time. Further down the line, they are trying to see if the snake has two separate digestive tracts and if a head dominates the other.
Scientists say the snake is lucky to have survived the wild. Other two-headed snakes have been found in Honduras, the United States, Sri Lanka and Argentina. Thelma, one of these snakes, is held at the San Diego Zoo on the US west coast.
How To Be Politically Correct
March 14, 2008
This issue is getting more and more common, the correctness I mean. So when people forget being kind and just offend the a certain person or minority, here are some tricks you can use!
How to be politically correct about women:
1. She’s not doll, babe or sweety, she’s “a person gifted with breasts”.
2. She’s not easy, she’s just “accessible horizontally”.
3. Not a dumb blond, only a “a person with brightly colored hair who hasn’t kept herself informed”.
4. She’s not the ex, just “a person whose company I enjoyed”.
5. She’s not bugging you, she only “verbally repeats herself”.
6. She’s not a hooker you picked off the highway, she’s just a “a provider with discounted prices”.
7. She’s not a bad cook, she’s “only compatible with the microwave oven”.
8. She’s not wearing many jewels, she’s just “burdened with metal”.
9. She’s not a narcissist, she’s only “over preoccupied by her qualities”.
10. She’s not gotten fat, she’s just “went over her metabolic threshold”.
11. She’s not teasing or flirting, she’s just “engaging in artificial stimulation”.
12. She’s not anorexic, only “preeminently skeleton-like”.
13. She doesn’t hate football or sports, she’s just “ignorant, from an athletic point of view”.
14. She’s not just cold nor frigid, you can call her “inaccessible from a thermal point of view”.
15. She doesn’t have a lot of make-up, she just “reached cosmetic saturation”.
How to be politically correct about men:
1. He’s not an alcoholic, he just “developed an impressive quality of storing alcohol”.
2. He’s not a terrible dancer but merely “overly caucasian”.
3. He’s not wondering all the times, he’s only “exploring alternative destinations”.
4. He’s not going bald, he’s had “regressive pilosity”.
5. That’s not a hole in his pants, it’s only “a back cleavage”.
Beijing’s New Terminal
March 10, 2008
Beijing just opened up its new airport terminal - world’s largest and most advanced airport building. It’s not only a great technological advancement but a great passenger experience. The opening last month was announced by a group 10 musicians that played string instruments at an opening ceremony attended by Chinese officials. “It is the epitome of China’s fast-growing economy and portrays our strong state power,” said Zhang Guobao, deputy director of National Development and Reform Commission, the country’s main economic planning agency.
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When the cemetery’s full, please don’t die!
March 6, 2008
The title seems to be a little bit off, but the story is pretty much real. And this is all coming for the French. The mayor of a village in southwest France confronted with a severe issue: the cemetery is full, without any square to spare. To address the issue, Mayor Gerard Lalanne threatened the villagers with severe punishments if they were about to die.
The 260 residents of the village were told “all persons not having a plot in the cemetery and wishing to be buried in Sarpourenx are forbidden from dying in the parish.”
It added: “Offenders will be severely punished.”
Why these drastic measures you ask? The administrative court from a nearby village decided that the village Sarpourenx would not be allowed to extend its burrial grounds.
“It may be a laughing matter for some, but not for me,” he said.
via Reuters; photo source: Richard
World’s Most Beautiful Woman
February 29, 2008
It’s been decided - Carlizina Jolectron is the world’s most beautiful woman. After seeing the pictures and starting to get some fantasies about this hot chick, I find out she’s not real. Carlizina isn’t even a real woman - she’s a digital combination of Angelina Jolie, Charlize Theron and Carmen Electra.
This girl is a mashup - she has Angelina Jolie’s lips and hair, Carmen Electra’s eyes and Charlize Theron’s nose. Carlizina is just one of the entries in Photoshop website Worth.com’s contest to find the hottest celebrity, unreal of course. These guys were inspired by a recent study released by Beverly Hills’ plastic surgeons, that decided what are the most desirable celebrity body parts requested by their customers.
But what, it’s not over. This work of art was only one of the many submitted in the contest of Worth 1000. Here are more of the entries:
Gwenma Cruzman: Mostly Gwen (body, hair and eyebrows), the nose of Uma Thurman, mouth of Penelope Cruz and eyes of Salma Hayek
Michelle Theron: Some eye candy for those into blondes - Michelle Pfeiffer’s eyes, cheeks, neck and hair with Charlize Theron’s nose and lips
Fergalie Joston: I’ve seen Fergie without makeup so this creation doesn’t impress me much - Fergie’s body and hair (not Fergie’s body hair), Angelina Jolie’s eyes, Natalie Portman’s nose and Jennifer Aniston’s mouth
Dette Richake: For those that prefer a vintage beauty, here you have Veronica Lake’s hair, Bette Davis’ eyes, Denise Richards’ lips and Dolly Parton’s breasts
Natelina Stefek: This one is also hot since it reminds me of Angie… Angelina Jolie’s face, Natalie Portman’s nose, Gwen Stefani’s eyes and Salma Hayek’s mouth
Emma Aguilera: I think the second hottels of the bunch - Emma Watson’s eyes, Christina Aguilera’s nose, mouth and body, and moles from Angelina Jolie
Gembella Bosdel: This is kinda freakish and it Reminds me of the : figure Ginger Kids of Izabella Miko, Alexis Bledel’s eyes, Gemma Ward’s nose and Kate Bosworth’s kips
Why has no one used MJ’s nose? 
source: Worth 1000, Daily Mail
